Movie: Pirates Of the Caribbean - On Stranger Tides (2011)

Rating: C

Let's face it. Johnny Depp's portrayal of Jack Sparrow is the ONLY reason why this franchise is still breathing. If you've followed the franchise, you'll have come to not expect a whole lot. Without expecting a whole lot, On Stranger Tides, is surprisingly not bad.



While Jack Sparrow is the only reason why this franchise still breathes life, we've seen too much of the character for him to be the primary and only focus of this movie. And while Keira Knightley and that elf from that other film (no, his name does not escape me) don't reprise their roles in this chapter, there are enough characters to keep Jack Sparrow interesting.

The movie is a little long, and some of the scenes seem like they were half-arsed together. But if you just sit back and enjoy the alcohol induced slurred verbage (verbal garblety goop) that finds its way out of Jack Sparrow's mouth and the off balanced fight scenes, you don't really notice that this movie was made to pad certain wallets.

And yes, fans of the franchise, stick around for after the credits.

~Cheers.

Movie: Priest (2011)

Rating: F

I'm trying desperately to find a redeemable quality to Scott Charles Stewart's Priest, which is entirely too loosely based off of a Korean Graphic Novel of the same name. Oh! It was in 3D! Does that count?



A total waste of talent to cast Paul Bettany in this movie. While Priest had some nice high-production scenes and cool editing and effects, this movie could have been made with a cast of nobodies. The plot was a long drawn out cliche. The script was worse. And this mish mash of horror movie / post-apocalyptic / sci-fi / vampire / religious drivel just simply ended up being that. Drivel.

I'm STILL trying to find SOME redeeming quality to this movie. There simply isn't. And the end of the movie implies that there might be a sequel? Are you kidding me?!

~Cheers.

Movie: The Rite

Rating: C

From the preview, we're supposed to think, The Exorcist meets Hannibal Lecter. Given the pedigree of Anthony Hopkins and all the brilliant characters he's put together in the blast, this was a no brainer. The Rite is indeed a no brainer. As in, without a brain.



Anthony Hopkins did indeed deliver. His performance as usual, was stellar. But unfortunately, that's where the compliments end. The rest of the cast were duds. My guess is, that the director, Mikael Håfström was trying to stay true to the movie's original inspiration, and spinning a story around it, but the end result was neither horrific or exhilarating. Quite honestly, the trailer is much more intense than the actual movie.